I always believed in aging gracefully. That was until I actually started to age.

I thought aging gracefully meant I’d suddenly have Katherine Hepburn cheekbones, beautiful white hair and an elegant collection of loose flowing slacks.

Instead I have the same face I’ve had since I was about 13, only a few inches lower, I’m grateful to have any hair at all, and my elegant slack collection consists of jeans with elastic waists.

Therefore, I’m in the process of rethinking this stage of life.

Is it necessary to look, think, act and dress “older” in order to age gracefully?
Should I stop coloring my hair? I know you’re shocked; you thought that Reba McEntire red was actually my own color.

How do we maintain a youthful internal image of ourselves and still not look like caricatures of our 30-and 40-year-old selves?

Is it necessary to still be chomping on soy bean sprouts when we’re 90 to try and maintain our figures?
Or does aging gracefully mean we just accept that our bodies are changing and stop trying to fight it?

As I sit here drinking my safflower oil, pineapple and soymilk shake instead of eating the can of anchovies I really wanted, I think that I’d be really annoyed if I got killed doing something not all that much fun, like getting hit by a drunk driver while driving to the grocery for flaxseed oil and celery, and I hadn’t yet had my fill of my favorite foods. For me, those would be blooming onions with dipping sauce that you get at the State Fair, unlimited Chinese barbecued spareribs, and buttercream icing on chocolate cake after its been in the fridge awhile and gets like fudge. Then, on the other hand, I know that a regular diet of fried anything and ribs and icing would probably provide a not so great demise anyway.

I sustained myself through years of watching my weight by telling myself that when I was diagnosed with something terminal, then I’d give up all my healthy foods and just eat what I liked. Unfortunately I’ve learned it doesn’t work that way, either because a really healthy diet may help you fight the disease or else you don’t have the ability to digest the junky foods anymore or the desire for those foods just isn’t there.

So for the last year I’ve been going with the theory that I better eat all that bad stuff now while I was healthy so I wouldn’t feel deprived when I wasn’t. And the pounds piled on. When I saw a picture of myself with friends and wasn’t sure it was me, I knew something had to change. And it doesn’t help having a husband who people keep saying looks young for his age. I decided this week was the time to revise my “live for today” theory, therefore the soymilk shake.

So the question is, does growing old gracefully mean accepting that I’m not a size whatever any more or is it a vanity issue to want to be a size and shape that takes a lot of exercise and discipline and feels like being very self-indulgent spending all that time on myself? Or is it just common sense to do what you can do to stay healthy? Between the picture and all the latest information about the dangers of visceral fat (check that one out), I know something has to change in my “live for today” eating theory.

Then there’s the hair color issue and the other body parts (hair is not an actual body part, but it might as well be.) I’ve seen women my age who look beautiful with gray hair — my mother was one them — and I have an image in my mind of myself in a grey ponytail, denim jacket, hiking boots and a backpack seeing the world. When I see women like that I follow them around the airport trying to figure out their secret of looking so alive and vital.

Maybe I can stretch the image of growing old gracefully to include forgiving myself for being superficial. That would be really helpful and leave me a large enough window within which to rationalize a number of indulgent behaviors.

On the other hand, the very best time I’ve had in years was taking kayaking lessons this summer with Sophie and Noah, two of my grandchildren, and hiking areas I would not have had the nerve to do alone.
As one of the women said, dignity just goes out the window when you’re bending over in a bathing suit at our age pulling a kayak out of the water.

I was too worried about losing the paddle to worry about my rear view and the feeling of exhilaration trumped the dignity factor. (In the interest of full disclosure, in the week since I wrote those words I’ve been laid up with the worst back pain I’ve ever had, so that theory also needs a little revising.)
I’m still working on the clothes issue and as soon as I find a clothes’ guru, I’ll report on that.

In the meantime I’m still searching for the right “graceful aging look” that is age appropriate but still fun. I know that really short skirts are probably out over a certain age, but exactly where in the vicinity of the knee should a hemline go that is appropriate for my age, but doesn’t make me feel like an old lady?

I leave you pondering those heavy issues as I finish my milkshake, which is more delicious than it sounds. Except that I drank three of them instead of the recommended one.

But at least it’s not a blooming onion.

When one reaches the three-quarter century mark (as I did with the publishing of this issue) one pauses to reflect — at least this one has. Do we have 75 years experience or do we have one year’s experience 75 times?

Arguably, I fall into the former category largely due to a couple of life threatening experiences. The first occurred when a deer slug pierced my belly 46 years ago. As I lay on the ground facing death it was not so much my life flashing before me as it was all the unfulfilled opportunities. I vowed that — given another chance — I would make more out of life. A more recent experience, which occurred 12 years ago when a well-developed malignant tumor threatened to take me out of the game, generated another vow that if I survived I would adopt a healthier lifestyle.

Good judgment comes as a result of experience — which is the result of bad judgment. Some people learn from their mistakes while others never do. In the words of a German friend; “Ve get to soon oldt und too late shmart.”

Our generation didn’t know that if we smoked a pack of cigarettes a day there was only a 20 percent chance of living an active life much beyond 60.

Everybody smoked and if the tobacco companies knew about the danger they did a pretty good job of suppressing the evidence. Most of our friends have given up smoking as I did after my bout with cancer. Thank God I only smoked a couple of cigarettes a day.

Now we preach a gospel (through the pages of this magazine) of exercise, healthy diet and abstinence from life-threatening habits such as smoking and over-eating or not eating well. We try to wring the most out of every day because time on this mortal coil has become a much more precious commodity than ever before now that the end is in sight.

Having achieved virtually every goal set for myself during the last 75 years, now it is time to establish new goals for the next stretch. Recently, an article in “Life Extension” (a great tool for keeping the golden years golden) revealed that, because of medical advances and health research, living an active life for 100 years and beyond is achievable to any person with reasonable health.

Additionally, an article in “AARP Magazine” (another great magazine for us 55-plusers) tells the story of Costa Rica’s remarkable centenarians. The village of Hojancha, on Costa Rica’s Nicoya Peninsula, has one of the healthiest, longest-lived populations on the planet. Living to 100, for the people of this unique village, is almost the norm.

Their lifestyle reveals much about living healthy well into the century mark. Here are some aspects:
• Strong sense of purpose — They have a clear mission in life, which is called a “plan de vida.” They feel needed and want to contribute to a greater good.
• Drinking hard water — Their water has one of the world’s highest calcium content, which perhaps explains the centenarian’s lower rates of heart disease, stronger bones and fewer hip fractures (a leading cause of death among octogenarians).
• Focus on family — Nicoyan centenarians tend to live with their families and children or grandchildren, which provides support and a sense of purpose and belonging.
• Eat a light dinner — Eating fewer calories appears to be one of the surest ways to add years to your life. Nicoyans eat a light dinner early in the evening. Their traditional diet of fortified maize and beans may be the best nutritional combination for longevity the world has ever known.
• Maintain social networks — Nicoyan centurions get frequent visits from neighbors. They know how to listen, laugh and appreciate what they have.
• Work hard — Centurions seemed to have enjoyed work all of their lives. They find joy in everyday physical chores.
• Get some sensible sun — Nicoyans regularly take in the sunshine, which helps their bodies produce vitamin D for strong bones and healthy bodies (this message is endorsed by the Florida Chamber of Commerce).

After researching for this article I am convinced that living an active, healthy life for 100 years and beyond is entirely feasible and therefore this has become another goal for me. PMA (positive mental attitude) is a vital part of the program. Whether you think you can or you think you can’t — you’re right.

Harold Miller is a retired business leader and Auburn native. He may be contacted at HMillerMod@aol.com

I don’t know about you, but I find the jokes about presidential contender John McCain’s age to be getting old.

True, the Republican nominee would be the oldest president elected at 71, but so what? Is every person over the age of 65 automatically to be disqualified because of his or her age? The last time I looked, the Constitution said to be eligible to be president, a candidate had to be at least 35. The Founding Fathers did not mandate a cut-off age.

Late-night comedians, such as Jay Leno, David Letterman and Conan O’Brien, have been having a field day with McCain’s age, but are they stepping over the ethical line and unwittingly affecting the outcome of the presidential race by diminishing the perception of the candidate?

Here’s a sampling of some of these jokes:

“Barack Obama said that he is going to fight for votes in all 50 states; meanwhile, John McCain said he’s going to fight for votes in all 13 colonies.”
Conan O’Brien

“Earlier, John McCain released 1,200 pages of his medical records, or, as his doctor calls it, Chapter 1.”
Conan O’Brien

“McCain came out with a list of 20 possible running mates. He would not reveal the names of all of them, but he said they all share certain traits, like knowing CPR. He said he wants someone who is ready to take over on day two.”
Bill Mahar

“The presidential candidates have been arguing over who is the most qualified to answer the White House phone at 3 a.m. McCain says he is the most qualified since he is usually up at that hour peeing anyway.”
Conan O’Brien

“Two State Department employees were fired because they were looking at Barack Obama’s passport file. Not only that, but the same person was also looking at John McCain’s Civil War records.”
David Letterman

“Senator McCain is in Iraq; of course, he remembers Iraq when it was known as Mesopotamia.”
David Letterman

How much impact this constant age humor will have when voters cast their ballots on Nov. 4 is anybody’s guess, but in a society that equates youth with vitality and energy, one must figure there will be some fallout. Even if one person votes against McCain solely because of his age, it would be a victory for the purveyors of age discrimination.

What is the definition of “old”? Is age a chronological milepost or a condition of the mind and body? Does every human become “old” at a given time or does each do it individually based on a complex set of criteria?

I am 69 but walk nine miles a day, every day of the week; even though I may be considered old chronologically, is my body old?

Making fun of political candidates is one of our God-given guaranteed rights as Americans, and, let’s face it, some of the McCain jokes are amusing, but what price will we pay for those laughs?

McCain has little choice but to play along with the gags.

For example, when he appeared on the Conan O’Brien show in July, O’Brien said he wanted to get away from these “old” jokes and was looking for some new material. McCain drew a big laugh when he pretended to fall asleep in his chair.

In May, on the Saturday Night Live’s season finale, McCain pleaded with voters to elect someone “very, very, very, very old.”

Whether confronting age head-on, much the way John F. Kennedy took on his critics over his Catholicism in the 1960 presidential election against Richard Nixon, will help diffuse the issue has political scientists lining up on either side of the question.

Several comedians admit privately that making fun of McCain’s age is an ethical conundrum, but such a convenient target is too juicy to ignore, they admit.

When it comes to humor, comedians are eager to find a niche that immediately identifies the butt of the joke, but, even more important, gets laughs, and, sadly, the age jokes are getting lots of yuks, primarily from younger, more-affluent Obama supporters.

Writing in “Associated Content,” William Tapscott tells the story of a high school-age girl sporting a “vote for McCain” button coming to McCain’s home the day after a debate with Obama.

“I saw you on TV last night,” the girl says. “You were great.”

“The other candidate says I am too old; he says that I’m losing my memory and won’t be able to remember the names of foreign officials, but I am going to prove them wrong,” McCain says.

“Now, what is your name, young lady?” McCain asks.

The girl looks confused. “It’s ME, grandpa,” she says.